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DeAnna Pappas said she loves surprises -- especially ones that don't end with her receiving a rejection. "This is a good surprise," Pappas told Reality TV World during a Wednesday conference call about
The Bachelorette's pre-taped fourth-season finale, which will air next Monday night at 8PM ET/PT and end with her "very happy, in love and engaged."
"With [
The Bachelor eleventh-season star Brad Womack], I kept it a secret because I wanted to know if someone could figure out what in the world happened. I didn't want anyone to know the outcome of the show because I didn't understand. I went through a break-up by myself, and I didn't understand it. Now this is a happy ending, and it's a good surprise. I don't want anyone to know because I want everyone to watch it. When you see the final episode it's so good -- you're going to laugh and you're going to cry. It's just a beautiful episode."
Pappas said it's been "almost three months" since
The Bachelorette's fourth-season finale filmed and she chose between Jason Mesnick, a 31-year-old account executive from Kirkland, WA, and Jesse Csincsak, a 25-year-old professional snowboarder from Breckenridge, CO.
"It was never, ever an easy thing for me to say goodbye to anyone. Even so, I think the final Rose Ceremony was harder than anything else in the whole world," she told reporters during the conference call.
"How are you supposed to look at someone and tell them that you care about them so much but you can't choose them because you care about the other guy more? That definitely does not make you feel good about yourself. I can promise you that."
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"You better believe you let me know."
Pappas described Mesnick and Csincsak as "two totally different people," and she said she's also a "different person when I'm with each one of them."
With Mesnick, Pappas said she "never, ever had to wonder if he was a good father" because of his 3-year-old son Ty -- whom she met during his hometown visit.
"He has Ty, and that's one of the best things in his life. If you don't fall in love with that child, than there's something wrong with you," Pappas told Reality TV World.
"He's a wonderful, wonderful man and has a beautiful outlook on life and love -- especially considering some of the things he's been through in his lifetime. He's very generous, very caring, and he would always listen to me. If anything was ever bothering me he would always say, 'Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?' He was just always there for me and I knew I could depend on him."
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"Ah, here comes Admirer Number Three."
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Mesnick waited a few weeks into the competition before he revealed to Pappas that he was a single father -- a decision he initially fretted over. However she said she's happy that's the course he decided to take.
"I'm definitely glad that he waited until we had time to talk about it. It's not like, 'Hey, I have a dog.' He has a child that's important to him -- the most important thing in his life," she told Reality TV World. "I'm glad he waited it was until it was just me and him and we could talk in detail about what is important to him."
In addition,
Pappas said she wasn't bothered that Mesnick was a single father -- even if it meant she could simultaneously become a wife AND mother if he's her selected suitor.
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"Good one - my dad! Ha ha!"
"I want to be a mom someday, I want to have children of my own," she told Reality TV World. "I knew my life would change, and I wanted to make sure that I was ready for that because when you bring someone's child into that, you're not just dealing with someone else's heart. Now you're dealing with two people's hearts. I wanted to make sure I was ready for that, but it was never a determining factor."
As for Csincsak, he was somebody who immediately stood-out from Pappas' other suitors and received one of her first-impression roses during the fourth-season's premiere.
"Jesse's that crazy, snowboarding, long-haired kid on night one. I was wide-eyed when he got out of the limo because he was wearing that crazy jacket," she told Reality TV World. "But once you get past everything crazy, he's actually a wonderful human being. He has a big heart, he's caring, he comes from a great family. He's that person that's always going to make me laugh, and he puts me first."
However it took Csincsak longer than most of the other suitors to have a romantic connection with Pappas, but she claims that "never really" deterred her from constantly keeping him in the running for her heart. Her persistence paid off, as the two finally got romantic during his hometown date.
"I would say it was probably [during his hometown visit] when I really felt that romantic connection with him," she told Reality TV World. "I remember in the car ride home after snowboarding in the mountains and there was no cameras around and we were sitting in the car on the way to meet his parents, and I just sat there and remember thinking, 'Wow, I cannot live without this person in my life.' That was the first time that I really felt that romantic connection with Jesse."
While viewers have already gotten to see Pappas visit both Mesnick and Csincsak's hometown and meet their respective families, now they'll get to see both of them travel to her Georgian hometown during Monday night's finale.
However there's a twist, because instead of Mesnick and Csincsak making separate visits to the Pappas residence, they'll do so together.
"It's actually really funny. It'll definitely be very entertaining for everyone to watch... I knew it was going to happen but you can't prepare yourself for something like this," she told reporters during the conference call.
Despite the oddness of the situation, Pappas said both men handled it very well.
"They have been friends through the entire show and they will be friends for life. They totally handled it like mature adults," she said. "Obviously it's awkward. We're in a three-way love triangle. Both of these guys are falling for me and I'm falling for them. It's strange. I'm sitting in my house in between both of them. Just wait until you see."
Entertainment aside, Pappas said the guys visiting her family was important to her.
"As everyone knows, my family is the most important part of my life. Sometimes I think that they know me better than I know myself," she explained. "So I definitely wanted them to meet the Final 2 guys and hopefully help me out with the final decision that I was going to have to make. So I think the guys were more comfortable in that situation than I was."
Since Pappas is so close to her kin, she told reporters she plans on keeping her Atlanta home in spite of both of her final two suitors living no where near there.
"We're talking about it," Pappas told reporters when asked about where she'll live with her chosen bachelor. "I'm definitely going to keep my house in Atlanta because I love Atlanta. I grew up there and that's where I'm from. It depends. We'll discuss that a little more in detail next week."
Next week will be the first time Pappas and her selected suitor can be seen in public together, however that hasn't hindered them from several secret rendezvous while the show was airing.
"ABC is behind me 100%, and they've been really, really good to me," she told reporters. "I get to speak to him everyday, whenever I want. We talk to each other a lot. We get to see each other quite a bit, but nobody's allowed to see us. We definitely haven't been to dinner yet."
Pappas reiterated that "dinner in public" is one of her top priorities once the finale airs and added no wedding date has been set.
"We're definitely taking it day-by-day," she told Reality TV World when asked about wedding plans.
Should Pappas actually walk down the aisle with her selected suitor, she'd be following in the footsteps of
The Bachelorette first-season star Trista Rehn -- who got engaged to and married Ryan Sutter.
Ten months later, ABC aired a three episode series that detailed the events leading up to their December 2003 wedding ceremony and over 17 million viewers watched the couple exchange vows on
Trista & Ryan's Wedding finale broadcast.
Pappas said televised nuptials could also be in her own future.
"We haven't put a lot of thought into it, but we both know we have a lot of fans behind us. There's a lot of people that have followed me since my season with Brad, and I know that there's a lot of followers and supporters that would like to see that happy ending," she told reporters. "I can't say I put a lot of thought into it, but I'm not really opposed to letting those fans into that part of my life."
While the wedding isn't even its planning stage, Pappas had one word to describe it: big.
"It's going to be big. I have a huge family, there's no way I could cut down my list. We've already thought about it, and it's just ridiculous," she told reporters. "It's going to be a big wedding and I'm kind of a traditional kind of girl. I want lots of white."
In addition, Pappas told reporters she wants her wedding dress to be "simple."
"I want him to still look at me that day and know that he's still marrying me -- not some dolled up girl in this big fru-fru dress," she said.
As Pappas prepares for her family members, friends and millions of viewers to watch her choose between Mesnick and Csincsak, she said she still has a memento from the choice.
"I still have the piece of paper where I was doing my pros and cons because it was never an easy decision," she said. "It was always a very, very hard decision for me."
It's been since December that Pappas said she last talked to Womack. While he might have confusingly broken her heart -- twice -- Pappas reiterated her story will have a happy ending this time around, even for Womack.
"Everything happens for a reason," she said. "He's a good person, and I'm sure he's ready to live down
The Bachelor experience. Poor Brad, everybody's had to hear about him all season."